There are no ordinary people

So, this morning I woke up to a monster in my room.  It was a cockroach the size of ME just chilling on my wall when I opened my eyes.  I sat up so quickly that my entire puny little metal bunk bed almost tipped over.  I didn't scream though.  I just ushered it out the door and didn't invite it to come back...or to come unto Christ.

I haven't seen any snakes yet.  hopefully soon.  If not, I'll have to get a tattoo of one (woop - there it is).

I feel like I've been here for 100 years, but then I realize that I still don't even completely know my way around this place.  But this last week, I really focused on my attitude.  I studied the scriptures so hard and drowned myself in studying the characteristic of Christ.  Then, I tried to apply those to myself.

I'll be honest...it's freaking hard.  Especially when my natural reaction to many of the things I face each day would be to just roll my eyes, say a sarcastic remark, cry or even swear (wait. what?)

But this week, when we would get lost, or punted, or when we would not understand what someone was saying to us - basically whenever we were in a pickle -  I would just think, "oh this is hilarious.  This is way better than 'Keeping up with the Kardashians' - I wish my family could see this."

It takes a lot of motivation and courage to get out to work.  Like in Santiago, it used to be I was anxious to get the morning studies done so we could go out and find people and teach...But here in Solano, I find myself cherishing  every minute I get to study.  And when time is up I think, "I'm scared to go out and face the world - I wish I could just do language study for the next 100 hours."  But that lack of courage has helped me...I know it has...because I literally have to plead with Heavenly Father to take care of me.  I plead with him every morning before we head out to work to help me, to be my companion, and to send angels to walk with me.  He's pulled through for me.  He always does.

                                   I saw a miracle this week.

In our area we take a tricey out to our furthest point and then walk our way back as we stop by those we teach.  I've gotten used to getting punted 98% of the time.  And on this particular day I was seeing that kind of outcome as we got rejected about 13 times in a row.

As we were walking down the highway, Sister Nawere stopped at a gate.  I asked who we were seeing.  She struggled to answer me, but tried her best to explain that she had never really met the lady before, but knew that she had been baptized, but wasn't coming to church.  So, this Nanay came out and looked at us like we were strange.  She was hesitant to open the gate and asked why we were there.  I proceeded to introduce who we were and asked her name and other 'get to know you,' questions.  She let us in, but her attitude was hard.  Which just made me work even harder to get to know her.  The miracle....she knows English.  Super well.  Like at one point I just stopped speaking in Tagalog and spoke to her in English.

We talked forever, and as time went on, it was very apparent that her heart was softened.  She opened up to me about how she stopped going to church because she didn't feel completely accepted.  She told me about how after the missionary that converted her went home...nobody ever loved her so much.  She didn't feel welcomed.  She said church was uncomfortable because she felt alone.  It broke my heart. Because I was thinking about M. and N. and M. and T. and the other investigators I had in Santiago and how much I loved them...and how my final last words to Sister L. were "L - take care of them.  They are so important to me."

It made me think of this missionary that she talked about, and how sad he would feel if he knew that one of the people he taught and baptized and loved so dearly wasn't feeling the love that she needed.  Nanay E.  showed us pictures of this Elder and told me stories of how incredible and close he was to her family.  As I stared at the pictures, I could only imagine him saying the same thing to me, "Sister Frame - please take care of her.  She is so important to me." It then clicked.  All of it.  I could just picture the Savior saying it to me, about all the people I meet here in the Philippines.  "Mads  - please take care of them.  They mean so much to me."

My love for Nanay E. was overwhelming.  I just wanted to tell her, but couldn't even express it all in words.  So I did my best.

I told Nany E. a few things.  The first being that she was a pure answer to my prayers.  I told her about how I'm new to this area, and not completely comfortable, and how even as a missionary I'm looking for friends.  And how I was praying to meet her.  I had been praying ALL week to meet someone that I could talk with.  The second being that I loved her.  I just simply stated that.  And then I bore testimony that I know her Heavenly Father loved her.

We've been back each day.  She's very special to me.  Heavenly Father really had my back that day.

I really got to know Sister N. this week.  She's a sweet girl.  I tried to put myself in her shoes.  I put myself in the situation of not knowing Tagalog which took no effort at all, but also not knowing English.  I have it easy compared to her.  So my love and appreciation for her diligence and work and smile grew ten fold.  I'm grateful for her.  It doesn't change our ability to speak, but it makes the days easier, more peaceful, and more enjoyable.

The work is scary, frustrating, hard, and at times feels impossible.  But it has the most happy, spiritual, rewarding and peaceful moments that make it worth it.  I'm grateful to be a part of it.

Have the best week - Merry Christmas - I love you.

-Sister Frame

alma 34:41

Heaven Pictures

We don't have Thanksgiving here in the Philippines, but naturally, I've been reflecting on the things I'm most thankful for.

So, I figured, I'd send a list of a few:

I'm Thankful for the weather:  It was actually like 102 this week.  Seriously - so miserable.  Then on Thursday Heavenly Father wanted to do me a solid favor and He made it super cloudy and windy. and no rain!  It was the coolest.  Sister L and I were walking down the roads passing the fields.  We stopped and sat down on a hill for a little bit to soak in the perfect day and share what we are grateful for.

I'm  Thankful for Sister L:  She's my best friend.  She's afraid of dogs....which supplies a whole lifetime of laughter as we work.  There are a lot of dogs in the Philippines.

I'm Thankful for the colors in the Philippines:  It's beautiful.  This place is beautiful.

I'm Thankful for Nanay V:  She has beautiful eyes that light up the world.  I don't know if I'm ever gonna see her again.  I will hold on to the memory of hugging her goodbye yesterday after church.  I didn't have the heart to tell her I was getting transferred.  But, I can hang out with her in heaven one day.

I'm Thankful you can J-Walk in the Philippines:   Technically you can't.  But nothing happens if you do.

I'm Thankful for "heaven pictures:"  Loey taught me when I was in high school.

Heaven pictures are for when you don't have time to take a picture with a real camera.

Like when you are in the moment of walking down the road and a tricey with 17 school kids hanging off of it as it drives by.
Or when you are sitting at your desk studying, and you look out the window to see a 90-year old, 4 foot nanny walking by with a basket full of things that weigh 6 times more than her on the top of her head.
I've taken millions of heaven pics.  I CAN'T WAIT to see the slide show of them all when I get there.

I'm Thankful for the lesson we had with Tatay C on Saturday:  This really was a miracle.  T.C. is one of the smartest men I've met here.  The C family used to be active in the ward.  Each week.  Lots of kids.  Then.....? Every missionary fears T.C.  Nobody has the patience or confidence to teach him.

On Saturday, Sister L and I went over there.  He asked us who we came to teach.  Somehow, Heavenly Father gave us the courage to say, "Ikaw na lang T!"  (you!)
He seemed shocked, hesitant.  Then he agreed.  I turned to Sister L, so nervous.  I was praying really hard.

We just talked with him.  Not as missionaries.  But as fellow siblings.  As children of God.  And we listened to him.  The spirit was stronger than I've ever felt it.  really.

On Sunday - he came to church.  for the first time in 13 years!!  It was incredible.  It being the first Sunday of the month, he stood up and testified of the truthfulness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  It was the coolest moment to be able to witness.

I will never forget the feelings I had in that lesson and in that testimony meeting for the rest of my life.  This work is so cool.

I'm Thankful for classic Filipino kids:  Sister L and I were lost in our own world of enthusiasm after the lesson (mentioned above).  After a few minutes of talking with each other I turned to notice 16 little kids, barefoot and giggly following closely behind us.  Trying to be sneaky.  When they noticed they were caught they started laughing even harder.  So...I started running...and they started chasing.  This white girl running down the dirt roads of the Phlippines being chased by a gang of 4-10 year old.  (don't worry.  i turned to take a heaven pic).  It was so fun.  It's these moments I love.  The moments that make everything worth it.

I'm Thankful for Costa Vida and washing machines:  enough said.

I'm Thankful for my family:  obviously.  you're all astir talaga.

I'm Thankful for the memories of Delta Phi 47th and the incredible friends/roommates I've been blessed with.  You have taught me more than you know.  I'm grateful.

I'm Thankful for this Gospel.  It's all we need to be truly happy.

"A grateful person is rich in contentment.   An ungrateful person suffers in the poverty of endless discontentment."  Elder Bednar

Sister Frame
Favorite Scripture this week:  1 Thessalonians 5:18

Lessons

I love Sister L., my sassy companion.  She's my sister.  We only have two more weeks together.  Right when I get comfortable with my life in the mission, I'm stripped of all security.   But that's good, right?  to put full reliance and trust in the Lord.

Mom and Dad, you'll be so grateful that I taught my anak this week the lessons I learned from you:

DAD:  One day L. and I walked the entire planet and got punted 100% of the day...meaning our discouragement and frustration level was at an all time high.  We had been out walking since early afternoon and had an hour until curfew.  We felt like the most pointless failures and had absolutely no where to go...because we had been everywhere!  I contemplated going home and calling it a day.  I mean...we had worked our hardest. 

It was at this point where L. and I were standing on the curb giving each other the look of, "well, now where do we go?" that I remembered the story Dad told me right before I left on my mission.  The story when he was in Hawaii and walked so far to give food to that homeless man.  That came to mind.  I thought, "Mads, how far will you go?  How far are you willing to walk?"  so...I pointed and said, "this way," and we just kept walking.  I knew that L. was literally gonna collapse in frustration at this point, but as we started walking down the road, I began telling her the story.  I knew she was touched because by the end of the story we were two sister missionaries in tears walking down the road at 8:15 pm.

Now, this day doesn't end in any miraculous way - but we did stop by Cn and Cl's one last time just to see if they happened to be home.  I have never been so thrilled to see little Cn's head pop up out of the window when we called, "Tao po."  My jaw dropped, and I looked at L. and exclaimed, "ah!  We walked far enough."  Being with Cn and Cl are the perfect way to end the day.  They are my best friends.

MOM:  During companionship study L and I got on the topic of rejection and how discouraging it truly is.  I remembered what you taught me the summer in St. Louis.  I was hating knocking doors.  You told me, "Just have 2 minutes of courage."  Sometimes it doesn't even take a whole 2 minutes.  Sometimes all it takes is 2 seconds.  It's the 2 seconds of courage that it takes to first open my mouth to introduce ourselves.  It's the 2 seconds of courage that it takes in the morning to roll out of bed and kneel for my prayer and start the day.  But those little moments of courage are what help us as missionaries.  Without them, we would get no where.  So thanks Mom.  for that motto.  it's carried L. and I through the week.

I still look up at the clouds and sometimes wonder where Neverland is...I feel like it's close to the Philippines.  If I find it I'm moving in with Peter Pan.  But, really I'm just obsessed with the silhouettes of the palm trees and the clouds and the moon as we're walking the streets at night.  That's my favorite image.

I still have to eat rice everyday.  I heard a rumor that there is going to be a Taco Bell in the new SM they are building in Cauayan.  It that's true, you won't hear from me on P-days any more cause I will travel all the way to Cauayan every week for it.  That's your heads up.

I love you - thanks for the prayers and support.  I miss you all more than you know.  But, Heavenly Father has my back over here.

Favs:  Alma 5: 12,14; Doctrine and Covenants 103:36

November 8, 2013

I'm grateful to have the opportunity to write...as in - I feel very very blessed that I am a missionary in an internet cafe with the ability to write home, and I'm not a missionary in the Tacloban mission where I'm either considered "missing" or haven't been heard from.  Sister L. and I were at an investigators house when they were watching the news of the typhoon.  It's unreal.  Remember that movie that we all went to see last winter about the Tsunami.. I can't remember the name, but it made all of us cry.  This news was just a replay of that.  I was sitting there on the floor with my eyes glued to the TV completely numb.  Watching these people and everything being destroyed, it makes me sick to my stomach.  As for me and the fellow missionaries in the Cauayan Mission, we are safe and sound.  Thankfully.  Please keep praying for those people in Leyte.

This week I really focused on the Spirit.  I feel like so many people expect that a mission is 18 months or two years of feeling the Spirit constantly and being on some floating cloud of glorious spiritual upliftment.  It's not.  Don't get me wrong - there are miracles and so many experiences that I have been privileged to be a part of that can't be expressed with words, but there are many hours of...not that.  Many hours of discouragement and frustration and pure pleading to Heavenly Father for help.  But this week - I tried to recognize the holiness of every day.  Life is busy.  Always.  Especially life outside of a mission.  Every day, each of us are faced with responsibilities and distractions, but how often do we take the time to sit back and look for the holiness in the simple things?

As I really tried to focus on it, I felt the Spirit so much stronger, and I'm able to recognize the hand of my Savior so much clearer in my everyday life.  Just walking down the street, even though it's hot, dirty, smelly, I see the beauty of my surroundings, the nature, the people in their holiness.

I'm very grateful to be a part of this Gospel.  It's real.  I know that with the entirety of my heart.

love and miss you all!

-Sister Frame

Jacob 5:23-24
                                     
     

Hymn 172

Happy Halloween everyone!...we don't have Halloween here.  I've just been listening to Christmas music the last two months.  It's getting old.  Thankfully, the weather is actually cooling down.  It's now in the mid-70's.  I don't have to sleep with an electric fan 3 feet away from my bed anymore.  

Sister L. and I worked especially hard this week, and we saw miracles.

On Tuesday, we were walking around town, laughing, telling jokes as always - trying to talk to everyone we see, and we got to one of our investigator's barangays.  We fully expected to get punted...as always, but...

As we were walking through the Alley, we saw this Nanay who popped her head out and smiled (with no teeth - which made it even sweeter).  She asked us what we were teaching.  We started talking to her about how we are missionaries.  She mentioned that she saw us a few weeks before when we were walking through the rain -the day before the typhoon - and she thought to herself, "They must have something important to do if they are out in this weather."  Then, the next day, she had a heart attack!  She said at the hospital she realized that she's not ready to die, and that there's more she needs to do in her life.

So when she saw us, she felt the strong prompting to talk to us...and here we all were.  Right away we started getting to know her and teaching her about the Gospel.  And once again - I saw firsthand the truthfulness of the promise that Heavenly Father has promised us - 

that He does prepare people and He does send them our way.

Also...there are many beggars here.  Unfortunately.  This last week Sister L. and I went to McDo's for breakfast for our six week anniversary - ok, in celebration of us finishing our first six weeks together. It was about 7:00 am, and as we sat down, I noticed this barefoot boy sitting on the curb right outside.  He waited there with a whistle in his hand for cars or triceys to come, and he would direct them into a parking spot or help them back out, in hopes that he would get a peso for a tip.

I watched this for a while, no longer hungry, and I know he was staring at me in return, too.  But he wasn't staring at me like every other beggar that wants money, he was just looking at me like I was another human being.  Like I was his sister or something.  There was so much depth.  Sister L. and I ordered some more pancakes and hash browns and took them out to this boy.  As I sat down next to him, I asked how old he was.  15.  I then asked where his parents were.  Not around.  I just pictured Davis in his position, and my heart literally ached.  If this was my little brother sitting on the curb directing cars from sun up to sun down for money, I would pray that somebody, anybody would do something nice for him.

His name is C.  He's the politest person I've ever met.  And all day long I could not stop thinking about him.  Each night I pray that he finds a safe place to sleep.  Every time L. and I see him around town now, we buy him some food.  This week our goal is to invite him to church.  There's no harm in an invitation.

That's a taste of some of the people I came in contact with this week.  The Philippines is incredible, right?  These people - so humble, and I have much to learn from them.

I'm grateful to be a missionary.  It's so hard.  But, it's an experience that is priceless.  It's rewarding, and the most humbling thing I've ever been apart of.

Thanks for the updates and love.  Mahal kits.  Syempre.

Favorite Scripture:  Alma 7:11-13

-Sister Frame

this is what Charity looks like

I want to tell you about two little girls that I love with my whole heart.  Really.

Cn. (8) and Cl. (10).

I met them back in July.  when we were teaching their dad.  His name is Cr.  I wrote in my journal that night, "He is so sweet.  I can just see it.  The light in his eyes.  He is special."So, we taught Cr. a little bit...when we could.  He works in the rice fields, so he's not always home.  He's in his 50's, and his eyesight is bad, so he didn't really read the things we asked him to.

One day, we were there when his two daughters came home from school.  They walked in the gate and passed right by us, walking straight into the house without even giving us a second look.  Cr. called for them to come out and say hello to us, but they refused.  So shy...and that was our first meeting.

Later that week, Sister P. and I were walking to church and saw Cr. and his two little girls there in the parking lot.  We ran over to them and welcomed them to church.  We were SO excited to see them!  We took the girls to primary and showed Cr. to the Priesthood meeting.  Unfortunately, that was the last time we got Cr. to church.  We continue to teach him every once in a while.  He told us how much his girls loved primary.

So that brings us to the first week with my companion, Sister L.  6 Sundays ago.  We were sitting with the congregation, and toward the end of Sacrament Meeting, I noticed two little girls sitting a few rows up.  I remember thinking, ""where are those girls' parents?....wait,...is that?  no....it couldn't be!

It was!
It was Cr.'s little girls!  They went to Primary, Sunday School, and sat reverently all through sacrament meeting by themselves - knowing absolutely NO ONE and being too shy to talk to anyone.  As the meeting got over, I quickly ran up to them and expressed my excitement to see them.  I asked where their dad was, and they so quietly responded "bahay naming" (our house).  I then asked if Sister L. and I could come to their house later and see them again.  They said yes.

That night we went back to the household, not for Cr.  This time for the adorable little girls that just weeks before were too shy to acknowledge our presence as missionaries.

The first lesson was painfully quiet.  They were almost too shy to even make eye contact with us.  But, we know they wanted us there because as we were leaving Cn. asked when we were going to come back.

We go back every other day.  To those precious little girls.  Cl. is Laren and Cn. is me.  I see us in them.  I noticed it first when Cn. burped so loud during a lesson.  She just laid it out there, and you could see in her eyes that even she was a little surprised at the power the burp had.  Such a big noise came out of such a precious little girl.  Classic.

But each time we go there, I see it more.  We taught them to pray a little while ago.  Cl. opened the lesson with the prayer (quietly), and at the end we asked Cn. to say the closing prayer.  Cn.  didn't say "No," but she looked to Cl. with these helpless eyes.  And without any exchange of communication, Cl. knelt down next to Cn. and helped her.  With quiet words, she would start a sentence and let Cn. repeat after her.  Together they gave the most beautiful prayer that I have heard in the Philippines.

I was so touched.  Cn. looked to Cl. for the help and without any hesitation, Cl. helped her little sister.  Cl. is a little fashionista. Cn. is a little more loud and quirky.  Cl. genuinely cares for Cn. Cn. looks up to Cl. in every way.  They protect each other.  They are perfect sisters.

Each time we go over there they tell us how they pray together morning and night, before they eat and before they leave for school.  They continue to come to church each Sunday, too.  Without fail, they are there early waiting in the front of the church for us to arrive.  They even came and sat through General Conference with us like champions.

In the past, Cr. told us that his wife was in Hong Kong working as an OFW (overseas' Filipino worker).  This week we asked Cn. and Cl. about their mom.  We started with the question, "When is she coming home?"  Cl. said, "When I'm in grade 6,"  (Now she's in grade 5).  Then we asked her when her mom left.  Cl. said, "When I was in kindergarten.  Cn. was just a baby."

This is where I broke.  These girls!  I can't explain it.  They are just so full of light.  Cn. always gives the closing prayers in our lessons, and the last few weeks Cl. has made the habit of sneaking quietly away.  She usually makes it back in time before Cn. finishes, but there have been a few times where we say, "Amen," and Cl. is just gone.  ha.  At first we were confused, but she always comes back with something.  Like the first time it was a beaded bracelet she made for us.  The next time it was chocolates she saved from school.  Once it was Chinese stationary from her mom.  Last night it was a band aid.  When she gave it to me I said, "oh!  a bandaid.  Salamat!"  Cn. then laughingly asked why she gave me a bandaid.  I was confused myself.  But she pointed to the scab on my arm...it was so genuine.  

We give them a hug goodbye each time we leave.  And they always remind us to return the "day after tomorrow."  Sister L. and I will leave and be walking down the street...3-5 minutes later we will hear, "Bye Sisters!" We'll look back and see that they will have quiety followed us from a far distance, and right before we head out of sight, they yell goodbye.

These girls have taught me a lot.  More than I could ever teach them.  I've seen the pure love of Christ in them.  They are perfect examples of Charity.  I'm trying to be more like them.

OK, super long - if anyone is still reading this, I love you.  I miss you all.  

This Gospel of Jesus Christ is real.
And this mission is so humbling.
I'm enjoying the journey
and meeting people that I will NEVER forget.
We are all blessed.  Don't every forget it.
mahal na mahal na mahal na mahal do kayo!

- Sister Frame

the one where she describes the typhoon, not the earthquake

and A Trip to the Zoo

This week...there was a Typhoon (Mom, how did you know?  are you stalking me?  are you here?  if you are...stop hiding.  come hang with Sister L. and I).  The day before it hit was super windy and stormy...naturally.  All day we were receiving texts from the mission home for preparation and updates.  The town people were on the move to higher ground.  Sis. L was shocked I still suggested we work.  But it was so funny to work - like the wind made it fun to trudge through the streets.  Whenever anyone did anything, L. and I would look at each other and say, "ooooh.  The Typhoon, that's why."

not funny?  maybe ya had to be there.

We're still hearing typhoon excuses....two days later.

The funniest part is...the typhoon completely missed us.  I woke up Saturday morning, and the first thing I said to L. was, "uh...hello!  did we get skipped!?"  all the hype - for nothing?  But really it was a blessing.  Because a lot of the people (all of the people) here in Santiago can't afford a typhoon.  really. Typhoons ruin lives.  People don't come back from those.  So, we are truly blessed.  I don't know how the rest of the mission did, but my area is alive and well.

Also good:  the typhoon did not affect our ability to watch conference.

Conference was the best.  My favorite part of the week.

As for investigators - we have lots.  We're working on their progression...some right now are struggling in keeping commitments.  They are SO CLOSE to having so many blessings.  L. and I are prayerfully studying and working on the lessons to teach so that they can understand the importance of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Sometimes complications come in with the whole "marriage" situation here.  There is no such thing as a normal divorce here in the Philippines.  One of our biggest set backs is people getting or being married. It's expensive.

But, Heavenly Father is in charge.  We'll figure it out.

I love you all, thanks for everything.  The Gospel is so real.  Count your blessings.  Write them down.  Read them when you're having a hard day.  Then thank Heavenly Father for them.

Fav Scriptures:
2 Nephi 2:8 and 26:33
Mosiah 2:36 and 4:9-10
Revelation 3:20-21

Our district went to the "zoo" last week.  How can I say this?  It was basically just all the animals I see wandering the streets everyday...behind a cage.

-Sister Frame